The Haynes Life: Giving this Christmas

Our girls are the perfect age for Christmas. They get so excited to see our elf moving around the house each morning. The Christmas morning surprise to see that Santa ate cookies and brought gifts literally had Carmen singing and jumping around the room.

The past few years we've had a problem with buying too many things for the kids. We want to be able to give them everything they want but realized that we really shouldn't. Teaching disappointment is a valuable lesson. Don't get me wrong, they still have an amazing Christmas, but we really try to keep the gifts from us to a minimum now. Here is how we approached the holidays this year.

1. We changed our approach to giving gifts to the kids

2. We wanted to teach that giving is just as fun as receiving

3. Enjoy giving to others

4. You have to earn the extra stuff

Our new approach to presents

This year we adopted the something you want, something you need, something to wear, and something to read concept but we also added in a craft. What I found so valuable this year when buying gifts was buying them in categories. This way I didn't buy the girls so many toys. They really only received one toy from Jeff and I.

Giving is as much fun as receiving

Now that the girls are old enough, I had them give gifts to each other. I went shopping with each of them individually and we spoke about what the other would most enjoy to open on Christmas morning. They both put a lot of time into their choices and it was fun seeing them give each other their presents. In fact I think they like those presents the most.

Giving to others

Fleetridge does something special for the holidays. They ask if families can help giving to those students at school whose parents can't afford presents at Christmas. What I enjoyed about helping with this, is that Carmen realized that there are kids just like her who need extra compassion. Instead of adopting a family where we didn't know anything about them, we knew that these kids went to school with her. She and I took a shopping date to Target to hopefully brighten some holiday mornings. She loved it and started to understand that she is lucky to have the family she does.

Earning the extra stuff

Since we didn't buy the kids everything they want, I remind them that they can earn money to purchase those things themselves. Believe me when I say it is an internal struggle to not go purchase the extras but I believe that you can work for what you want even at a young age. In fact today Carmen was playing with a new toy called Beados. She already used all the beads in one day and needs more. As easy as it is to go spend $10 on more beads, I want her to learn that even though she wants more right now she won't get them. I told her she needs to save her chore money to get them herself. Yes, I know it is a small example but it hopefully small lessons will help out in life.

Here are some pictures from the holiday.